Firsts with the fourth

I've had 4 babies,  5 pregnancies,  5 c-sections.  That's pretty experienced.  Every pregnancy and every baby is different, but there have been some absolutes among them.  I'm going to be sick, anti-nausea medication is not going to help.  I'm going to have heartburn that burns my entire torso, tums won't help.  The baby will not come early, s/he won't even try to be on time. There will be a c-section, and recovery will be smooth.  

Here's what I just found out... and can't believe I was 4 babies in when learning it.

Buy the washable breast pads.  I know that no mama ever needs one more piece of fabric to wash.  That has been the driving force behind me always using disposable pads.  But, these are soooo worth the effort.  I never knew.   A close friend has been making face masks and had leftover fabric, she sewed a couple of pairs for me.  They were quickly renamed "boobie pillows".  Holy cannoli.  Heaven.  They are heaven, and I cannot believe I've nursed babies for 6 years without them.  Sorry, boobies.

Get at least one pair of compression leggings.  I've had 4 c-sections, and honestly couldn't imagine putting pressure on my incision would be comfortable.  I knew nothing.  After reading several testimonials, I bought a pair.  My husband had to help me into them a week after delivery.  A friend came to our house to do a newborn session and I wanted to wear them.  I almost chickened out when they were halfway up.  Soooo glad I didn't.  I could literally hop up from my recliner.  I was able to twist and turn during the photo session,  my friend even commented on my mobility.   Best. Buy. Ever.   Again,  can't believe I went so long without using a pair.

Adult diapers.   Who knew??  While the mesh undies and boat pad combo given at the hospital isn't super dignifying, adult diapers just sounded horrible.  They aren't.  They work, are more comfortable, won't leak, and you just throw them away.  Perfect.  There was a time that I was changing diapers for a newborn, toddler, and myself.  A diaper assembly line.  And, I still recommend them 100%.  I also recommend potty training the toddler BEFORE baby comes...

Also, sugar waxing.   Getting this done at 37 weeks means no worries until the other side of postpartum.  Completely beats trying to shave right before delivery.   Or worse, let the preop nurses come at you with those horrible clippers.  

What pregnancy/postpartum firsts have you learned multiple babies later??

The important things.

We all love a sirsee, but this child holds special memories to them.  A sirsee, for those who may not know, is a small surprise.  An inexpensive trinket that you didn't expect.  When my mom was local and I would swing by her house, she'd sometimes have a super cute pair of socks or a dish towel for me...a sirsee.  For kids, its maybe that impulse buy when checking out at Target or a small toy at the Dollar Tree.  When I'm out and happen to see something that I think my kids would love, I pick it up for them.  

This is my 5 year old wild child with a soft heart.  He cannot remember where he put his coat 3 minutes after taking it off, or to use an inside voice, or that he isn't allowed to run in the house.  But, he'll bring me a sirsee from 2 years ago and tell me about how he remembers that Daddy gave it to him that time he got a kids meal and went to that park with the big swing.   Or, that time Mommy had to get new tires and he got a small toy and a bag of chips... that time his ears didn't feel good and we went to the doctor and stopped at DT for a little toy... that time Mommy and Daddy came back with a small surprise after he stayed with a sitter. 

He remembers each one.  The next time I'm frustrated that he doesn't remember where he left his right boot, his polar bear face mask, or that we don't bounce balls close to the TV; I'll remember that he does remember the important things.  That he'll remember how much and often we think about him among the chaos of life.

It's okay to mourn the small things.

There's nothing like Facebook Memories to remind you what you used to have.  I know there have been losses much greater than birthday parties since COVID started, but this is what I mourn today.  Pre-COVID birthday parties.  The picture shows my oldest at her 6th birthday party.  Her birthday is in January and we booked an indoor pool.  For a bonus for her (and mommy), we had a mommy and me pedicure date with some friends and their daughters the night before.  Aaahhhhh...nail salons.  Lots of people, sitting right next to each other,  talking without masks.  Who knew that would become so precious.

This memory pops up on the heels of us making the decision to cancel this little girl's birthday party this year.  Her first ever slumber party.  That's a big deal to an 8 year old.  The COVID numbers are rising again, the hospitals are full, the news is scary.  So, we do the responsible thing and cancel.  She'll still have one friend sleepover, have pancakes with candles, and get presents.  We still plan to take her to American Girl as planned.  But, it's still different.

It's okay to mourn the small things.